I remember that when I was a child I use to write frequently about everything, I don´t know if it was because diaries with locks were trending and I loved them, but I wrote everyday, and now that I´m an adult I have heard many people´s suggestions to have my own diary and to write every feeling and every thought I have in order to liberate all those bad moments and thoughts I you have in my head, and Oh My God, this is one of the most difficult things that I have tried to do nowadays.

This is my story!

I´m Yubi, I´m 31 years old, I´m from Mexico City, I´m a MD, I have a master degree, I got married 2 years ago and I moved to Chicago one year ago because of my husband´s job. I used to work in Mexico but because of obvious reasons I had to quit. At the beginning I was so excited because it´s a new City, a new lifestyle and if you add the beauty of this City it´s like a dream come true! I was waiting for my permission to work and the days started to pass, and then they became weeks, and then months….. and then many things started to happen, but those things were only in my mind, or that´s what I think. I started to feel depressed because I had nothing to do, I hadn´t met new people, we don´t have friends, I have no job…. and I don´t have a routine to follow….. maybe this sounds weird because I have heard a lot of women talking about the life of their dreams and it is the life that I´m living now….. but for me it´s different, I like to work, I like to wear elegant clothes, I like to drive and to have business meetings and all those kinds of things that people who work do. This situation was driving me crazy, my health issues (SIBO and eating disorders) were getting worse each day, so I needed to do something that made me feel awake and ALIVE!

So, I decided to go to India for 6 weeks (but that´s another story)!!!.

I came back in the middle of November and I was almost ready to apply for a Job, (I forgot to tell you that I received my permission to work like 2 months before my trip, but I already had everything bought) except for one thing: I didn´t feel my english was perfect in order to start to work! So, I had 1 month to get prepared: I asked my friend who I actually met in India for help, his English is perfect so I said: I need him!!!! (it´s worth mentioning that I spoke English but the basic level I think, not the level you need for having a business conversation, so I started to take English classes since I arrived to Chicago but I didn´t learn a lot). So, in December, I set a goal: I had to start to apply for a job in the middle of January. I was very happy during December: my birthday, Christmas, visit from my father and sister, I was renewed after my trip, I felt like a new me.

January came: new year, new goals, new attitude, new everything, I was so excited but then I started to feel sad again, depressed, angry, with low energy, I didn´t want to do anything, just watch T.V. and that´s all!!! I started to suspect something, that was not me and even more after my super spiritual trip!

My suspicions came true! My hormones were having a party!!! Surprise!!! Baby on board!!!!